A Sad Story: Anonymous Christian
[Disclaimer: If you’re younger than 21 years old, please do NOT read the below. Your lack of maturity & Judgment may cause you to be disturbed by these real life descriptions]
It was New Year’s Eve, 2015. This man has left his past life with escorts for about 5 and a half years already, last being in the middle of 2010. He hasn’t touched any woman wrongly for this entire period of time.
However, New Year Eve’s night was different. He is ‘healed’. The punishment (spiritually poured out into the flesh evidenced by un-explainable bodily pains) was “over”. God has healed Him completely.
He knows clearly the ‘risk of punishment’ if he falls into sin again. He decides to take his chances to ‘sin tonight’, “one last time”. But why? And why after such a long period of successful abstinence & positive spiritual progress (by God’s Grace)?
The answer is simple: Never once in his entire life with escorts in the past has he ever had ‘sex without bodily pain’. This is the first time in his life (post his fall) he feels “no” physical bodily aches. Hence, he wants to have ‘sex with no pain’ at least once & that’s it (so his inner thoughts reveal).
Yes, in the past (even when he first lost his virginity at the age of 23), he had ‘sex with unknown bodily pains’ (probably the *sign* for the entrance or infestation of demons).
Well, New Year’s Eve night began with a threesome (overnight) with two escorts at a Hotel. The next day, he had sex with another two women escorts, a total of 4 women in all in less than 12 hours with some help from Viagra (using this for the first time too).
When it was all over, a heavy cloud of guilt and sorrow kicks in. How could you have ‘destroyed’ all the repentance which you’ve built painfully for 5 and half years just like that? It’s all a sin and he knows it well (‘never’ denying this fact even once).
Furthermore, it has been remarked that since this fall has happened, the devil may have successfully ‘robbed’ (or ‘taken away’) a possibility of ‘marrying a good wife’ (in the future, being single now) which *might* have been possible had these 12 hours of sin had NOT happened. It is close to impossible now since ‘trust’ has been compromised.
Despite his wisdom, he has been foolish in that 12 hours. It comes as a “no” surprise if he be judged by that ’12 hours’ more than the 5 and a half years since this is his ‘latest occurrence’. He has to accept the consequence since ‘wrong is wrong’ and ‘sin is sin’.
What can he say? Sorry to God first and the rest whom he has let down especially those who have followed in the spiritual messages given.
The Christian message remains true regardless of whether or not the person delivering it falls into sin. What changes is that the messenger who falls into sin comes under the ‘risk of stricter punishment’ by God. [Please remember that Christian history also has many great Universalist Christian teachers from Clement of Alexandria, Gregory of Nyssa to the more recent Sadhu Sundar Singh who did “not” fall into such sins as he has committed].
“Not many of you should become teachers, my fellow believers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly.” (James 3:1)
The question to punish or not rests entirely in the Hands of our Blessed God, Who alone is Holy. Time will tell which God decides and he has to accept it (including the possible lost of rewards and/or blessings which might have been inherited had these ’12 hours’ never happened). It is always best to confess the truth regardless of ‘how bad or shameful it is’. No point in hiding (or covering) it.
In fact, he may “lose all his good works” done in the past as this verse points out:
“But if a righteous person turns from their righteousness and commits sin and does the same detestable things the wicked person does, will they live? None of the righteous things that person has done will be remembered. Because of the unfaithfulness they are guilty of and because of the sins they have committed, they will die.” (Ezekiel 18:24)
Yes, you may call him a ‘dog’ and he accepts this humiliation with deep sorrow (as he ‘returned to this sin or vomit’, even though just this once or briefly):
“Of them the proverbs are true: “A dog returns to its vomit,” and, “A sow that is washed returns to her wallowing in the mud.” (2 Peter 2:22)
What he intends to do?
Confess and Repent; though these words may “not” be believed easily this time around due to the fall described above.
The main reason he is writing this is because it is a requirement (speak truth only) to ‘confess one’s sin’ before ‘repentance follows’ and hope that God shows Mercy by forgiving him as it is written:
“Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy.” (Proverbs 28:13)
“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9)
Believers, do pray for him as well (than you in advance):
“Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much.” (James 5:16)
Lastly, he is not thinking of the possible loss of rewards, blessings or anything else above this: “forgiveness”; for the deepest cut in the heart came after the realization that he hurt Lord Jesus Christ by doing this.
And his last desire is that: though the world may renounce him once and for all for this, let it ‘never’ be so with our Blessed Saviour of the World, Lord Jesus Christ. For there remains “no” light outside of Him, “no” salvation in another Name “nor” any hope beyond Him.
Who is “he”?
I am “he”.
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